I have a way of knowing when I'm running on empty. My body tells me, in the same order, every time.
First comes the breathing. Almost every week I catch myself breathing shallow, or holding my breath for a few seconds without noticing. Nothing dramatic. My breath just isn't flowing at its normal pace.
If I miss that one, the next signal is my upper back and shoulders. The tension builds and I feel a pull to get on the foam roller or grab the medicine ball and work it out.
And if I ignore both of those, my body stops whispering. I get a cold sore on my lip. That's my body saying: you are not only stressed, you are starting to run down. Now please listen.
THE LADDER OF WHISPERS
Looking back, this is how it works for most of us. The body doesn't start by shouting. It starts quietly, and it gets louder every time we say "later".
Mine goes breath, then back and shoulders, then cold sore. Yours might be a tight jaw, a short temper, a headache at 3pm, a stomach that tightens before a meeting. The signals are different for everyone. What's the same is that there's a ladder, and most of us only start listening at the top.
WHY WE MISS THEM
It's not that you don't care about your body. A busy life is loud. Notifications, deadlines, other people's needs, your own to do list. When your attention is always outside, there's no room left to notice what's happening inside.
I spent years in a corporate career missing the first two steps completely. Back to back meetings, lunch at the desk, coffee to get through the afternoon. By the time I noticed, the body had already had to raise its voice.
WHAT I DO WHEN I CATCH IT
Nothing complicated. When I notice shallow breathing, I stop and take three to five slow, deep breaths to come back to my centre.
If I'm at home or outside, I take my shoes off, step onto the grass and do the same thing. Three to five deep breaths, feet on the ground. It brings me back to earth, literally.
It takes less than a minute. And it's a lot easier than recovering from a week of ignoring the signs.
START BY LEARNING YOUR OWN LADDER
This week, try to notice your first whisper. Not the loud one, the quiet one that shows up before it. Is it your breathing? Your shoulders? Your mood? Once you know your first rung, you can catch it early.
A quick note: cold sores are common when the body is run down, but they can have other causes too. If something keeps coming back or worries you, talk to your doctor.
If you'd like to practise listening with others, I'm running a free guided meditation, Argia Monthly Stillness, on Thursday 19 November at 6:30pm Sydney time. This month's theme is Listen to the Whispers. It's online, it's free, and you don't need any experience.